Check on a Buddy This Holiday Season: How Norwich University Built a Culture of Looking Out for Each Other
A Simple Monthly Ritual Shows How Vermont Communities Can Combat Isolation Through Regular Check-Ins
The winter holidays can be a difficult time for many Vermonters. Between shorter days, challenging weather, and the pressures that accompany the season, feelings of isolation can intensify—especially for veterans, seniors, and those living in rural areas. But a simple practice championed by Norwich University shows that a quick phone call, text, or email can make all the difference.
Since January 2023, the Norwich University Alumni Association has asked graduates to do something remarkably straightforward: take a few minutes on the 18th and 19th of every month to reach out to a classmate or friend. That’s it. No formal training required, no scripts to follow—just a simple check-in to see how someone is doing.
The timing isn’t arbitrary. The 18th and 19th commemorate Norwich’s founding in 1819, turning what could be just another calendar reminder into a ritual tied to institutional pride and shared identity.
Why a Simple Call Matters
The program’s genius lies in its simplicity. By framing the outreach as an act of friendship rather than a mental health intervention, the Norwich Buddy Check sidesteps the stigma that often prevents people from seeking help or accepting support.
Participants don’t need expertise in counseling. They’re simply encouraged to have a conversation—about the weather, recent news, or daily life. In that casual exchange, a friend who knows you well might notice something off: a change in tone, unusual fatigue, or withdrawal from normal activities. These subtle shifts can be early warning signs that someone is struggling.
Research shows this approach addresses a growing crisis. In 2021, 15% of men reported having no close friends, up dramatically from just 3% in the 1990s. This “friendship recession” correlates with rising rates of depression and suicide. The simple act of receiving an unexpected call creates what psychologists call a “sense of mattering”—the feeling that you’re significant to someone else. That feeling serves as a protective factor against isolation and despair.
Building a Culture Around Mutual Support
Norwich’s Buddy Check didn’t emerge in isolation. It grew partly from the work of Fins & Feathers, an alumni group that started as a fishing and hunting club but evolved into one of the university’s most influential fundraising organizations, raising over $500,000 in 2023. The group identified mental health awareness as central to its mission, recognizing that many Norwich graduates serve in high-stress military and first-responder roles.
To keep the program visible, Fins & Feathers donated a statue of a service dog named “Fin” that now sits outside Dewey Hall on campus. The bronze Labrador retriever sits beside an empty bench—a permanent reminder of those lost to mental illness and a daily call to action for students passing by.
The program has earned recognition beyond campus. The Council for Advancement & Support of Education honored Norwich with a Best of District award in 2024, acknowledging how the initiative strengthens lifelong bonds among graduates.
The university has expanded the effort through “Beyond the Buddy Check” panels featuring medical professionals, military leaders, and clergy who provide deeper resilience-building tools for handling financial stress, family challenges, and personal trauma.
Vermont’s Broader Buddy System Network
Norwich’s model builds on a longer tradition. The American Legion Department of Vermont has long viewed buddy checks as a sacred obligation, organizing teams to reach isolated veterans. Following a 2019 resolution, Legion posts across the state conduct systematic outreach where teams of ten volunteers each call ten veterans, allowing a single post to reach 100 people in one session.
The Legion’s approach is practical. Volunteers aren’t conducting therapy—they’re doing health and welfare checks, identifying immediate needs like home repairs, transportation to medical appointments, or financial assistance, then connecting veterans with local resources.
This model extends to Vermont’s senior population as well. The RSVP TeleCare Program in Rutland and Addison counties provides regular scheduled phone calls to older adults who want to age in place. Volunteers follow a specific protocol: they call at prearranged times, let the phone ring 15 times, and retry after 10-15 minutes if there’s no answer. If they still can’t reach the person, they activate a safety plan that includes calling emergency contacts or 911.
In southeastern Vermont, Senior Solutions operates a HelpLine and matches volunteers with older adults for safety checks and companionship. They also run a “Vet-to-Vet” program, recognizing that veterans often feel more comfortable opening up to someone who shares their military background.
The Eight-Minute Connection
One emerging concept in Vermont’s peer support discussions is the “eight-minute conversation.” Norwich alumni like Colm Walker (Class of 2005) have promoted the idea that a brief, intentional interaction is all that’s required to make someone feel heard and supported. This removes pressure from the caller to solve problems or provide counseling—the goal is simply to be present.
How Any Vermont Community Can Start
The success of Norwich’s program and the American Legion posts suggests that any Vermont organization—neighborhood associations, workplaces, social clubs, schools—can implement their own buddy systems. The key elements are straightforward:
Choose a recurring date that has local meaning to serve as a reminder. It could be the first Monday of each month, a significant anniversary, or any date that’s easy to remember.
Prepare a resource list before making calls. Have contact information ready for Vermont 2-1-1 (dial 2-1-1 for referrals to housing, food, and social services), the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (dial 988, press 1 for veterans), the Pathways Vermont Support Line (833-VT-TALKS for 24/7 peer support), and the Senior HelpLine (800-642-5119 for Vermonters age 60+).
Set up reminders. The Norwich program uses automated emails and texts to prompt participants on the designated days. Most email platforms or phone apps can handle this.
Frame it as friendship, not obligation. The check-in should feel like a natural conversation between people who care about each other, not a bureaucratic task or solicitation.
Know how to respond to crisis. If someone reveals they’re in immediate danger, having the 988 number ready—or knowing to call 911—is essential. The check-in isn’t therapy, but it can be the bridge that connects someone to professional help.
Where to Get Help
Vermont has multiple resources available for anyone struggling or concerned about someone else:
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Dial 988 (press 1 for veterans) for immediate mental health crisis support
Pathways Vermont Support Line: Call 833-VT-TALKS for 24/7 non-judgmental peer support
Vermont 2-1-1: Dial 2-1-1 for referrals to housing, food, fuel, and social services
Senior HelpLine: Call 800-642-5119 for assistance for Vermonters age 60 and older
Vermont Help Link: Call 802-565-LINK for substance use support and recovery resources
What Happens Next
As the holidays approach and winter deepens, the need for connection becomes more urgent. Norwich University’s example shows that combating isolation doesn’t require professional credentials or significant funding—it requires commitment to a simple, recurring ritual of checking in.
The university continues its monthly Buddy Checks on the 18th and 19th of each month, with participation growing as more alumni embrace the practice. The American Legion maintains its systematic veteran outreach across Vermont’s posts, while senior programs expand their reach to more isolated older adults.
The broader challenge is making this culture of mutual support universal across Vermont. Every neighborhood, workplace, faith community, and social organization can adopt some version of the buddy system. The message is clear: you don’t need to be an expert to make a difference in someone’s life. You just need to take a few minutes to reach out.
This holiday season, consider who in your life might benefit from hearing from you. Then make the call. It might be the most important gift you give.